Bin Laden’s Virgins

The likelihood that Osama bin Laden is currently philandering with seventy-two maidens with heaving breasts in a giant bathtub full of wine is exactly the same as the likelihood that the Christian Heaven exists.

Just sayin’.

9 thoughts on “Bin Laden’s Virgins

  1. Awesome image.

    Bin Laden enjoyed a quick death, and much less grueling than many who died in the World Trade Center buildings.

    Do you think there are members of al Quaeda who believe in homeopathy and are now interested in drinking ocean water for the memory it holds of Bin Laden’s remains?

  2. Love the “Just sayin…”

    You’re absolutely right of course.

    And why would they bathe in wine? That sounds sticky.

    This fantasy had to be made by virgins. Oi.

    • Mathematically, the likelihood of either being true is exactly the same. I’m not even comparing apples to oranges here. More like comparing Granny Smith apples to Fuji apples. Both instances (Muslim Paradise vs. Christian Heaven) hold exactly the same value and are totally comparable. This post isn’t even to say “…therefore, god does not exist.” That would be fallacious. Like I said at the end, “I’m just sayin’.”

      Surely, tossing out the names of a variety of logical fallacies when none actually apply is in itself fallacious.

      • Hi A. Dave,

        I wish it were that simple. Perhaps this will help:

        P1: Muslims believe in heaven
        P2: Muslim believe that 72 *maidens* will greet a martyr
        P3: Christians believe in heaven (enthymeme)
        p4: No rational person believes that 72 *maidens* are in heaven awaiting a martyr
        :. The Christian conception of heaven is false

        So, your conclusion does not follow from your premises. This is the textbook definition of a non-sequitar I could define equivocation for you and point out in your post where you commit that fallacy but I think you get the point.

        Oh, and by the way you are incorrect when you assert that the Christian heaven is *comparable* (what do you mean by that, exactly?) Do you mean to say that they share_every_single_property? Or do you mean they are similar? Obviously it is fallacious to say that because they are similar and share some of the same properties that if one is false then both are false.

        • I promise you I have not edited the original post. That being the case, where did I reach the conclusion that both are false? I simply pointed out they are both equally likely. Mathematically, that is entirely true.

          If there is no evidence that [Example A] exists or does not exist and there is no evidence that [Example B] exists or does not exist, then both are equally likely to exist or not exist.

          • Really?

            It seems to me that you were attempting to show the absurdity of one view and by way of analogy include another view in that conclusion. If that was not your project, then allow me to apologize.

            i. Just out of curiosity, what *evidence* would we look for to empirically verify the truth or falsity of the premise 1) Heaven exists? Using the same line of reasoning please prove to me *empirically* that other minds exist.

  3. A modest proposal
    1. Establish a secure 20 hectare site in Israel or the USA. Erect at least 3 pylons, with video cameras on it. Also establish 2 groups of quadrupeds on it, with 10-12 personnel to care for them.
    2. When we kill Anwar al-Awlaki, for example, bring the body and place it, face up, in between the pylons. Run the cameras, and release the first group of quadrupeds.
    3. After the first group has eaten about half of the terrorist, remove them and release the second group, which will finish the disposal.
    4. Edit the video down to 30 minutes, add voice-over or subtitles, which shall emphasize that terrorists are apostates to Islam; this method is for terrorists EXCLUSIVELY.
    5. Pay several go-betweens to leak the DVD to Al Jazeera.
    6. First group of quadrupeds are all-black dogs. Second group are pigs. In time, second group will provide gloves and boots for our special forces.

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